I’ve finished my work this week covering the Billabong Pro in Brazil. I do have one question. Who the fuck is Jadson Andre??? Oh wait… He is from here in Brazil… That explains it all now. Well, congrats to Slater for taking over the points lead. Congrats to Chas Smith for out-drinking everyone in the hotel bar, again.
So I go to the airport on Thursday to pick my brother Drew up who is coming in for the weekend. The waves are picking up again and we are going to make the best of it.
I didn’t bring my board with me since the airline wanted to charge me a $250 board fee. What the hell is that about? There were women on board my plane who had purses weighing more that my board did. There’s not a purse fee. Not kool man.
Because Drew is a student, he is able to get boards check in for only $20 per board. Great. I’d just have Drew bring mine with him and save the dough.
Drew is the golden boy of the family. Young. Strong. Smart. Good Looking. Catches air like Jordy. Get’s shacked like JOB. Has taste in women like Slater. The all American boy. Quite the opposite of yours truly.
So he lands around 1:30 on Thursday afternoon in Rio. He’s never been to Brazil before so he is stoked. We head over to baggage claim and wait our standard 45 minutes ‘board wait’ period. Then this short Brazilian dude comes over to us. He looks like Adriano de Souza’s twin. He must have stood a whole 4’ 11” tall wearing the airline uniform. But, there is one problem. He isn’t carrying the boards.
Baggage Dude (BD): Excuse me sir. Are you Mr. Steele?
Me: Yeah. What’s up Tattoo?
BD: Yes, we have had a little accident with your luggage.
Me: What do you mean by ‘a little accident’?
BD: Well, you have two very long baggages on de plane right?
Me: Yes Tattoo. We have two surfboards on there. What the hell happened to them man?
BD: Well one of my guys was a taking it out of the baggage compartment of the rear of the plane and going to put it on to the ramp to the ground. The package is so long that he lost his balance and fell out of the back of the plane to the ground.
Me: Just one? What happened to the board?
BD: Yes sir. Juss one. The second bag was already down. My man is hurt pretty good. I think he may have broken his arm or something.
Me: Shit. That’s not good. Where are they?
BD: They are a bringing them now sir. My guy is really in bad shape.
Me: Sucks for your guy. Though he probably had it coming. Maybe he’s been stealing shit out of people’s bags. Karma man. Karma.
So this other dude comes over to us with the two board bags. Fuck! Drew’s bag is mint. Perfect. My bag looks like they towed it behind the plane going down the runway. I just bought the damn thing two weeks ago too. Bastards.
We unzip my bag and amazingly, the board is still in one piece. It looks like it survived the fall. Thank God!
Rio
We take off and head straight for a spot where I’ve heard Slater and Parko are free surfing at. Waves are running 4’ to 5’ now. Nice little A-frames. The spot is perfect. And no one is there. No Kelly. No Parko. No one. We are pumped and Drew stands speechless on the beach. Drool starts to slowly pour out of his mouth. I tell him we must of just missed those guys. He asks if we can still surf. I say yes my brother. Let’s rock this party.
We paddle out. I am so thankful my board is survived the crash at the airport. Peckerwoods. Drew jumps up on the second wave of a beautiful set. He takes the right and destroys it. If the ASP judges were judging that ride, he would have gotten an 11.75. And if he were Slater, then the judges would find a way to give him a 5.25 for it. Fuckerz.
Next set comes in and I am all over it. A nice left for me and nobody else is in the water with us. I get up take a huge bottom-turn and climb up to the top. I come off with a large floater and then SNAP! Holy mother of God. My boards snaps in two. First damn wave and my day is over. I think Drew is pissing himself as he is laying on his board laughing his ass off.
I drag my board back to the beach. Both pieces of them. Drew continues to blast waves in between giving me the finger and laughing.
I have quite the sexy back...
Great story that makes me weaps to be near the ocean, but hate to get on a airplane!
amazing for a non surfer to see the ‘canoes’ pro and serious surfers have to back on the airplane.