Jamie O’Brien Turns Down $1 Million Dollars to Surf in the XSA

Jamie O'Brien

-Dubai

“That motherfucker said what?!?!?!” was Samir Shoozien, President of the Xtreme Surfing Association, reaction to what was just told to him by his aide after another no from Jamie O’brien’s team.

Samir is building the strongest group of surfers in the world for his XSA league. He was told that Jamie O’Brien was the best in the world. Shoozien had to have him. The competitive surfers in the XSA are all paid $250k per year as part of their contract. There are bonuses as well as endorsement deals available based on the talent of each surfer.

Samir said that nothing would stop him from signing JOB! He instructed his marketing team to find Jamie and make an offer of $500k to join the league. Samir said, “Offer him $500k! That is twice the amount of the other surfers!!! He will take that.”

Xtreme Surfing Association

Samir’s marketing people contacted JOB’s manager and made the offer. Within 20 minutes they got an answer back from Jamie’s team. No! Samir heard this an immediately walked out of his palace’s front door and kicked his camel squarely in the balls. “Goddammit!!! That’s not right. Fucking American!”

After Samir threw a 10 minute temper-tantrum, he came back inside and gathered his team and said, “Offer him One Million Dollars! Surely he can’t say no to that! I will own Mr. O’brien’s balls! He will surf for me. He will make me millions! I will control 100% of him. And in the end, I will have Charlie Smith writing for me!”

Samir Shoozien

The team left to make their offer. The following day, they called Samir instead of meeting him in person again. One staffer said, “He said no. Not just no, but hell no! O’Brien’s team said that even though it sounded like the XSA was the best way to competitive surf as well as the most entertaining, he was not interested for $1 million dollars. Said he has other things going on like Moto and such…”

Samir threw his cell phone down in the sand and started to cry like a baby. His phone began to ring again and it was another aide. “Boss, well we can get Mick Fanning instead.” Samir said “I want fucking excitement and not boring stiff fucking surfing! Pull your Greek fucking head out of your ass! Get me O’Brien and bring him to me now!!! I will talk to Peter at Boner Jeans and see if he is interested in having Jamie as their main model. Fuck!!! I will sweeten the pot and get him…..”

More to follow…

ZS