The Charlie Smith
A Little Color Wouldn’t Hurt
My Gawd…it seems with this long tall drink of water it’s all about the hair. Charlie Smith has just the most bitchin’ locks, makes my poor heart just go pitter patter.
OK, OK, get hold of yourself Bobby; this is a fashion review not a scouting mission for Chippendales.
Where should I start? That white t-shirt is far from being a fashion statement. One could think you could put a little more effort into your wardrobe; after all you are a celebrity. Of course the white does complement your bronzed skin, those rippling muscles…oh my, the tatts…. I must complement your choice of Forever 21 for covering up that miniscule white bit of material that barely passes as a proper tee. Perhaps a different color, like a deep strawberry that would bring out the gold in those gorgeous locks…
And those pants…yes they are made by Ever, but they are sooooo boring. Charlie, you have such sexy, to die for legs why must you insist on covering them up? And beige? You have more color scrolling down your arm than in your wardrobe. I bet you stand out in Hawaii just as much as those hookers with the sequinned tops and high heels on Kalakaua do. This is not the way to go incognito.
Why not give the ladies something to look at? A pair of shorts maybe, not those lame flowered disasters that look like Picasso threw up. Or those camouflage pseudo war numbers; they’d make you look too butch and would definitely clash with your to die for hair. Hmmmm…maybe you are aiming for the butch look…something to think about.
Swimwear, well shall we say that nothing less than a fashionable pair of Speedos is acceptable? Show off those legs, that sexy ass. Why do you hesitate? If you have a wardrobe malfunction you can always hide behind your surfboard. Or not…
Of course you could make an even bigger name for yourself by surfing bare ass naked. Just you and your board and the deep blue sea and nothing to come between you and nature…imagine the all over tan, the tatts flashing in the sunlight, blond hair framing that long drink a water face. No more incognito for sure, there’d be a harem of bikini clad bitchin’ chicks just waiting for you to ride the next wave to the shoreline. Not to mention a lovesick guy or two that’s hoping you might swing both ways.
Just don’t forget the sunscreen, dahling.
